The Art of Slowing Down

It is no secret that when you are in survival mode, it puts your body in stress.

Your body and your senses are constantly on the lookout for anything that could cause potential harm. In a normal, regulated nervous system, once the mind and body recognize that the environment is safe, it shifts back to the part of the brain responsible for creation. The nervous system regulates itself.

But when there has been trauma, or when you have been in survival mode for a long period of time, the nervous system cannot easily return to regulation. It stays in constant stress. The body does not feel safe again. The mind keeps activating stress responses, even when there is no real danger.

This keeps the nervous system in a state of dysregulation.

One of the signs of being in survival mode is that you cannot slow down.

Slowing down feels unsafe.

The nervous system wants to stay alert. And being alert means your body wants to move fast, your mind wants to figure things out immediately. Otherwise, it feels like something might go wrong at any moment.

Slowing down feels like putting yourself at risk, at least that is what the body believes.

I remember when my husband and I went bowling to celebrate a milestone. I am a newbie at bowling. What started with beginners luck slowly turned to get bad. I couldn’t even get one pin down.

I could feel my nervous system switching into stress mode.

Almost immediately, my mind went into: I want this to be over. I don’t want to do this. Or else I must get it right. The perfect shot.

That urgency, that stress, it felt so real.

But at that point, I had already been working on my nervous system for a few months. So instead of reacting immediately, I started becoming aware of what was happening within me.

I didn’t suddenly switch off the stress response.

But I noticed it. Awareness came first.

Then I made a conscious choice to slow down.

I slowed down between my turns. I took my time. I let my thoughts run, but I also stayed present with them.

Did I start playing better after that? No. My points actually went down.

But something else shifted.

The past version of me, the one who believed I had to be perfect to feel safe, would have wanted to finish the game quickly, escape the discomfort, and probably stay stressed for hours, even days.

But this time, I stayed.

I looked at my score and thought, this is not going well. But I am still going to try. Let me try one more time.

I also stayed with my emotions. I acknowledged them. I noticed that I didn’t feel good. That it was uncomfortable. That it was bringing up past experiences where things didn’t go well.

And still, I stayed.

After the game, we went for a slow, cozy dinner.

I leaned back. I allowed my body to settle. I took in the ambiance of the restaurant, the openness, the lighting, the music. I savored the food.

And slowly, my nervous system began to calm down.

By the end of the dinner, I felt so good that I didn’t want to leave. I even felt like dancing with my husband.

What also mattered deeply was that I communicated how I was feeling, and he gave me space.

Spaciousness. 🌸

Spaciousness in time.
Spaciousness in the environment.
Spaciousness within myself.

That evening showed me something important.

Calming your nervous system is not about fixing what is wrong. Sometimes, it is about slowing down enough to experience space again.

It is an art to slow down.

To slow down your everyday tasks. To allow your senses to take in what you are doing. To create moments where your body can feel safe.

Even if you cannot do this all day, you can create these moments at home. You can slow down your evenings.

I wanted to extend that restaurant experience into my home. So I lit candles. I played soft piano music. I dimmed the lights. And I slowed down. I let my eyes take in the softness of the candlelight. I listened to the music. I leaned back. I slowly sipped my hot drink. I journaled my thoughts in my favorite journal.

Winding down in the evenings can look like this.

Slow down and feel that there is no rush. No place you need to be.

Just this moment.

Just this space. ❤️

And in that space, you can feel something your body had been longing for.

Safety

If slowing down feels unfamiliar or even unsafe…

I created something to support you.

The Art of Slowing Down is a gentle journal designed to help you move out of survival mode and into safety, presence, and spaciousness.

Inside, you’ll find 13 pages of guided journal with

• slowing down rituals
• grounding exercises
• journaling prompts
• affirmations for safety